


A Friend and a Frown

by lollyflop



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2018-06-03 01:45:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6591559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lollyflop/pseuds/lollyflop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Farmer is desperate to make friends in the Valley. Shane is set on being no one's friend. Will they connect?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to try writing a story with a nongendered first person Farmer. I've been aboard the Shane train since my first day in the Valley! I love how his story is like a dark mirror to the player's, so I wanted to explore that. Let me know what you think!
> 
> As always, please forgive me if I get any details totally wrong. I try to research my lil' heart out, but I'm always playing loose with some of the facts.

I saw him standing in the corner of The Stardrop Saloon. He looked like he didn’t want to be there, but like maybe he didn’t have anywhere else to go.  
I could relate to that.  
Everyone else in the place was either already engaged in conversation or so lost in their brew that they didn’t even notice me come in, shaking off the cold spring rain.  
But he noticed me.  
I saw his dark eyes slide my direction as he took a drink from his frosty mug. His hair shone purple in the faint light of the bar. His stubble and ragged hoodie might’ve scared away anyone else, but I found it familiar and endearing. He reminded me of the boys my older brother had hung around when he was too old and too cool to spend time with his tagalong sibling.  
Just as quickly, the stranger looked away and jammed a hand in his pocket, shifting his weight onto the other foot. I started to doubt my plan. Maybe he didn’t want to talk to the new kid in town?  
‘You have to make friends here,’ I reminded myself. Taking a deep breath, I straightened my back and walked over to him.  
“Some night, huh?” It was limp and awkward. Oof!  
His face was blank. “Why are you bothering me?”  
My mouth dropped open. I gathered what was left of my dignity and turned to go when I noticed his beer was empty. I figured the only thing I could do was top him up. I walked over to the bartender and passed over 400 very hard-earned gold. I passed the mug to him and mumbled, “Sorry to bug you.”  
He blinked, then smiled slightly. “How’d you know this is my favorite?”  
“Lucky guess,” I replied, cautiously.  
“I’m Shane,” he supplied.  
I shook his hand and introduced myself. He settled back into silence, so I decided not to push my luck. “See you, Shane,” I waved, stepping away to have a quick word with Lewis.

 

I fiddled with the geode in my pocket as I strode toward the blacksmith’s shop. Someone mentioned that Clint might be able to crack this rock, and that there might be something interesting inside. I figured it was worth the long trek to find out. Who knows, maybe it held the fortune that would finally make it possible for me to buy a new rucksack!  
As I crossed the bridge, I did a double take. Just in the distance, I saw a sign for JojaMart. I had no idea this little town would even have one of those! They really were everywhere these days.  
I reflected on my job in the city: I’d worked for Joja Corp, then gone and spent my money at JojaMart, like scrips at the company store. The marts were so common in the city that it seemed like there was one on every corner. Even the little mom n’ pop shop near my apartment had been bought up and turned into a Mini-Joja. They were known for deep discounts on cheap products. I just remembered them as a soul-sucking pitstop on the way to nowhere.  
I usually did all my shopping in Pelican Town, but it had been a long while since I’d had something other than black coffee. A cold, fizzy Joja Cola would be a treat.  
I stepped inside and was blasted with A/C. I shivered, realizing it was the first time I’d felt refrigerated air since arriving in the valley. Everything was bright and fluorescent. It took a second for my eyes and mind to get accustomed. Aisles and aisles of boxed, bagged and canned products stretched before me. I walked past the registers and let my fingertips graze a display of vibrant, garish cases of cola. I smirked, thinking that Pierre would never stock something like this in his shop.  
“What are you doing here?” The whispered, serious voice surprised me. I turned on my heel. There was Shane, a mop in his hand, looking annoyed.  
“I… I was th-thirsty,” I stumbled, waving vaguely behind me at the wall of pop. I felt embarrassed, realizing that the ragged hoodie he’d been wearing the other night had been a JojaMart uniform. I’d been silly not to notice the trademark blue logo, faded as it was.  
He glanced around before letting his dark eyes focus on mine. He let a silence hang between us. “You can’t be here distracting me,” he suddenly insisted, making a little shooing motion.  
I hustled out of the store and marched back to my farm, forgetting about the geode I’d walked all that way to have cracked.  
‘I was distracting him?’  
When I went to my mailbox the next morning, I found a note from Shane and a bottle of juice.  
“This is way more refreshing than a stupid Joja Cola. -Shane”

 

I had made a habit of stopping off at the Saloon in the evening. I’d send a beer Shane’s way and start chatting up the locals.  
The locals. Heh. I still didn’t feel like one of them.  
One night, I waved at Shane as I went to make my way home and he grabbed my sleeve. “I’m surprised you’re still trying to make friends with me,” he said, his face stony. “Haven’t I been rude enough to you yet?”  
“Evidently not,” I shrugged, pulling my sleeve out of his hold.  
“What do you want from me? Money?” He frowned, “I’d give you a pot of gold to leave me alone.”  
I don’t know what it was about the way he said it, but I found myself laughing. Maybe I was exhausted from beating back weeds and chopping trees. Maybe I was just tired of how ridiculous my sad attempts at being his friend really were.  
At first, he looked aghast. But as I kept laughing, his face softened.  
“I’m just trying to make friends here, Shane. Honest,” I replied, sobering. “I’m on my own out here. I’m trying to start my life all over. And my grandpa would roll over in his grave if he knew I had been here this long and didn’t have one soul in this valley to call my friend.”  
A tear slipped from my eye before I could stop it. I wiped it away on my sleeve.  
Shane looked deeply sad. He nodded. “Goodnight,” he said, his voice a cracked whisper.

 

I was staring at the community calendar.  
Spring 20th. There was his face, a half smile playing on his lips.  
I blew a breath out between tight lips. This was it. My last ditch effort.  
I wanted everyone in the valley to like me. I knew it was a stupid aspiration, but it felt important.  
My grandpa had been on friendly terms with everyone in town. Lewis had told me many times that my gramps had been a really important part of Pelican Town. He’d kept the Community Center boiler room running and had played Santa every year during the Feast of the Winterstar.  
Those were some mighty big shoes to fill. Especially with one Mr. Grumpypants getting in the way.  
I had stopped by Marnie’s ranch and asked what Shane might like. I didn’t know who else to ask. I figured he lived here, surely she’d picked up on something about the man that might help me out.  
She thought a moment. A smile spread slowly across her face. When she made her suggestion, I was a little taken aback.  
“Are you sure?”  
I must’ve been looking at her like she was nuts. She gave a deep belly laugh and nodded knowingly. “Trust me,” she chuckled. “It’ll be a hit.”  
I was half afraid she was putting me on, but for some reason, she had a face I could trust. Anyway, what’s the worst that could happen? Shane would hate me? Already one step ahead of you, Marn!  
I waited on the bridge, tossing the little bundle back and forth between my hands. When five o’clock hit, I stood stick straight and waited. Right on time, Shane shuffled out of work.  
He frowned when he saw me.  
Without a word, I held out the little package.  
He stopped. “You remembered my birthday?” His face almost looked friendly. “I’m impressed. Thanks.”  
He unwrapped it, and a little smile played at his lips. “This is great,” he said, his voice warm.  
I had chosen the biggest egg from my hens that morning. I had no idea why Marnie suggested it, but it was clearly a winner. “Well, have a great one,” I said with a wave, heading back home.  
“You too,” he called.  
Score one for friendship.

 

I waved at him from across the table.  
He smiled.  
I ducked my head to smell a daffodil and to hide my blush. When I looked up, he was across the field, standing with Jas, ready to watch the dancers.  
I sighed heavily. I really wanted to dance with someone, but usually only people who were interested in dating participated in the big number. I took a bite of a spicy curry and let myself believe the ache in my chest was just regular ol’ heartburn.

 

It was a balmy evening. Summer was definitely here. Frogs were singing in the distance, heralding in warmer nights and longer sunsets. Something in their call beckoned me out to the dock to dip my toes in the lake.  
As I came through the clearing in the forest, I saw a figure standing out on the dock, barely illuminated by a lantern.  
“Oh,” I gasped before I could stop myself.  
“Up late, huh?” It was Shane. He didn’t turn around; he just kept staring out across the water.  
I hummed my assent and wandered up beside him.  
He glanced sideways at me and smirked. His dark eyes barely caught the light. He leaned over and fished a line out of the water, attached to a rack of beers. “Here, have a cold one,” he said, passing me a can. His eyes passed back to stare into the lake and we let the sounds of the night hang comfortably between us.  
“Buh… life,” he sighed.  
I blinked and looked at his profile. His expression was hard to read, but serious. And sad.  
“You ever feel like…” He shifted on his feet. “No matter what you do, you’re gonna fail? Like you’re stuck in some miserable abyss and you’re so deep you can’t even see the light of day?”  
I sniffed. I thought back to my desk job with Joja Corp. I had worked there such long hours that I almost forgot what sunlight looked like. My work took so much out of me that I started staying home most nights, just to decompress. My friendships drifted away from me and I felt so desperately lonely.  
Shane turned and look at me, his eyes purple and searching my face in the faint light. “I just feel like no matter how hard I try… I’m not strong enough to climb out of that hole.”  
I swallowed thickly. My heart was beating in my chest but I was tongue-tied. I wanted to tell him that coming to Stardew was my way out. I wanted to say that even trying to make friends with a Grumble Gus like him was a million times better than my life before. I wanted to tell him that there was always something better waiting just past what you can see.  
Instead, I drank deeply from my beer.  
“Heh,” Shane chuckled. “Fast drinker, huh? A person after my own heart. Just don’t make it a habit. You got a future ahead of you still.”  
I felt flushed from head to toe and deliciously dizzy. This impulse hit me to snatch his hand and step closer, but I kept myself still.  
“Welp,” Shane sighed, stretching. “My liver’s beggin’ me to stop. Better call it a night.”  
I knew if I opened my mouth, something foolish would fall out. So I just gave him a lopsided grin.  
“See you around.” He smiled at me. A real, genuine, unguarded smile. It was dazzling. It felt like a secret expression just for me. I felt like I was peeking behind the cloud, seeing him fully for the first time.  
And then he was gone.

 

I opened my mailbox and sifted through the letters. An ad from JojaMart, a rather desperate letter from Pierre, Pam finally admitting she was too lazy to walk across the room. I almost missed a hastily scrawled note:  
“I found this recipe in a magazine and I thought it sounded interesting. Feel free to give me a taste if you make it. hehe. -Shane”  
I smirked and glanced out at my field. As luck would have it, there was a mess of hot peppers blazing in the sun. I grabbed a fistful and ran into the kitchen. I started skimming over the recipe and realized that I didn’t have any of the equipment I’d need to make the Pepper Poppers. I frowned.  
“Well, if I can’t pop them peppers–” I sighed, “I’ll just wing it.”  
Carefully, I wrapped a mess of peppers up in a bundle and tied it with a ribbon. I sat it on a counter and glanced at my watch. I figured I had just enough time to wrap up my daily chores.  
I collected all the eggs, gave each of my chickens a soft pat and then watered each plant in the field carefully. I jogged up to forage a bit in the north woods before I headed back to fill the shipping bin for the evening. When I checked my watch again, it was 6:30.  
I dashed to the Saloon, cradling the bundle. Shane was in his usual spot. I walked up to him and before I could chicken out, I thrust the package towards him.  
His brow furrowed a little, but he sat his beer down and carefully began to unknot the ribbon. When it fell open, his face lit up. “My favorite!” He was beaming. “How’d you know?”  
I twiddled my fingers. “Well, you sent me that recipe, so I figured you might like hot stuff,” I replied.  
He was very still, his eyes taking in my face. “I really do,” he said.  
My face went pink.  
He chuckled to himself, then waved to Gus for two beers. He handed me one and I sipped it. My face must’ve showed my confusion.  
“What?”  
I met Shane’s eyes. “You like the good stuff,” I remarked.  
His brow furrowed. “Yeah,” he nodded. “I mean, I’m no snob.”  
I swallowed. “I know that,” I laughed. I realized that it was a good opening to press him for some information about himself. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.”  
He looked thoughtful for a moment. “I’m renting my room from Marnie at a really good price,” he started. “It’s small, but I can’t complain.”  
I suddenly wondered why he lived there.  
“She’s my aunt,” Shane supplied, as if he’d read my mind. Oh. So Jas…?  
“If I could reset my life,” Shane sighed, looking off at nothing in particular. “Maybe I’d start a chicken farm. Only free-range eggs, of course.”  
This surprised me. “I have chickens,” I blurted.  
Shane’s eyes danced. “Really?”  
I nodded. “Just four, but they’re all sweeties.”  
“What are their names?”  
I laughed. It seemed like such a funny question, but he looked genuinely interested. “You’re gonna laugh,” I teased.  
“Absolutely not,” he said, serious but friendly.  
“Marnie, Pam, Evelyn and Robin.”  
Shane guffawed. “You did not!”  
I nodded. “I did! And you said you weren’t gonna laugh.”  
He settled into a smile. “You didn’t say your chickens’ names were going to be awesome.”  
I don’t know what made me so bold, but I found myself asking, “Want to come over sometime and see them?”  
He cocked his head to one side. “Yeah. Maybe after I get off work tomorrow?”  
I blinked. “Tomorrow’s Sunday. Do you work seven days a week?”  
“Yeah,” he replied, as if it were no big deal. “I mean, so do you.” He smiled.  
I couldn’t argue there. “Okay, after you get off work, then. They might be a little sleepy, but they’ll still let you pet them.”  
Shane grinned. “Then, it’s a date.”

 

I had actually swept the floor of the coop. It felt really silly, but I was fine with being silly. I wanted the place to be spotless. Or as spotless as a henhouse could be, at least.  
I counted the girls as they waddled in for the evening, then went out of the fence to wait. Shane strolled up and handed me a box. “It’s a pizza,” he explained with a shrug. “I snagged it from the back room of work.”  
“Thanks,” I said, smiling. I gestured behind me. “Well, this is it!”  
Shane looked around. “This is a good fence,” he remarked, waving the gate open and shut. “Plenty of room, really healthy grass.”  
His compliments kind of had me off balance. I hadn’t heard any compliments on my hard work and it was delightful. I’d spent a good penny getting the grass started in there and it was nice to know somebody appreciated the effort. Well, besides the chicks.  
He strolled over and toyed with the hens’ “doggie door”.  
“Perfect,” he mumbled, patting the incline. “Just big enough to let them out. Not too big to let in coyotes or anything.”  
I grinned awkwardly. “Well, let’s go on in.”  
I opened the door for Shane and he ducked as he headed inside. He exclaimed, “Look how happy they are!”  
I was beaming. It felt so wonderful to have my work appreciated. It felt so wonderful to see him so excited.  
Marnie, always the friendly gal, bounced right up to Shane. He plopped down on his butt and Marnie flew right into his arms. He hugged her to his chest.  
“That’s Marnie,” I offered.  
He chuckled. “Of course it is.” He ran his hand down her back. “Such glossy feathers! You’ve been out in the sun all day, haven’t you? Pecking up all kinds of worms n’ stuff?”  
Marnie clucked happily as he spoke.  
I sat to the side and watched him chat to the chickens. He was so happy that the feeling was honestly contagious. As he stood and dusted off his shorts, I just couldn’t stop myself. I threw my arms around him and pulled him into a kiss. His lips were warm and his scruffy chin was delightfully rough.  
As soon as I realized what I’d done, I started to scramble away and apologize. But Shane caught me in a hug, gripping me in the small of my back. His face was serious and he leaned in. I licked my lips in anticipation, but he stopped when he was intimately close. His voice came as a whisper, “Not in front of the chickens.” He tapped my nose and strolled out of the coop, leaving me catching flies.  
“Bawk,” Pam chuffed.  
“Geez, okay,” I muttered, grabbing the box Shane had given on my way out. I laughed as I realized I was actually looking forward to a microwaved pizza.

 

Now and then, he would drop by my farm after his work shift ended. Usually, he brought me something from JojaMart, but occasionally, he’d come bearing a bundle of Sweet Peas.  
“Hey,” he whispered, goosing me.  
I hadn’t seen him coming so I screeched, turning on my heel and swatting. Before I could stop myself, I was crying.  
“Hey hey hey.” He gathered me up in his arms and soothed me. He waved the flowers under my nose. “It’s just me, Sweet Pea.”  
“I–I just,” I stumbled, wiping a tear and sweat and dirt from my cheek. I pointed to the ground where I’d been digging. Three sad little vines poked up from the earth. They were yellowing in the hot sun. Nothing I had attempted to grow before had looked so puny. Spring had gone so well for me, but I’d sunk a good bit of gold in these seeds and now I was afraid my profit was skittering away. If these didn’t grow, I wouldn’t be able to afford–oh I couldn’t even think about it! I sobbed, “I’m a failure!”  
Shane studied them for a second. “Well, I have some good news and some bad news.”  
I sniffed. “What’s the bad news?”  
Shane looked very serious. “I don’t know anything at all about farming,” he replied with a shrug.  
I frowned. “Then what’s the good news?”  
“I’m going to learn with you.” He handed me the flowers, then crouched down and took a little leaf between his fingers. “It doesn’t feel crunchy,” he commented. He poked a finger into the soil. “And it’s not dry, so it’s not underwatered.”  
I took a steadying breath. “Good,” I exhaled.  
“Maybe you watered it too much?”  
I pursed my lips. “M-maybe,” I admitted with a sniffle.  
He looked up at me. “What time do you water them?”  
I scrunched my face up to think. “Earlyish?”  
I glanced down and Shane was watching me, his eyes two big, warm puddles. He smiled to himself then looked back to the vines. “Maybe try watering them when the sun’s going down,” Shane suggested. “I’ll help remind you when I stop by in the evening.” He stood up.  
“So, you’re saying you’ll be stopping by more often?”  
He blinked. A smile spread across his lips. “I guess so.” He added, “For the sake of the melons.”  
“Oh, so it’s all about the produce for you?” I smirked.  
He shrugged, his head tossing side to side as if considering. “Maybe,” he drawled. He clasped his hands behind his back and rocked on his heels.  
“Nothing here to see but the agriculture,” I teased.  
“Well,” he corrected. “There are chickens.”  
“Oh, of course,” I laughed. “How could you go a day without seeing the girls?”  
His thumb caught my chin, and my breath. “Or this face?”  
He brushed a kiss across my lips, letting his fingers trail down my throat. I knew he could feel my pulse thrumming beneath his fingertips.  
All at once, he stepped away. “So tomorrow, about this time, good for you?”  
I nodded through my head fog, mumbling something like, “Sure.”  
He smiled, waved and headed South to Marnie’s ranch.

 

True to his word, Shane showed up nightly to remind me to water the melons. Sometimes, he just wandered into the house and grabbed the watering can to do it himself, especially if I was busy rounding up the chicks.  
One evening, he showed up just as I was wrapping up with Robin.  
I waved for him to come over. He shook Robin’s hand, his features twisted in confusion.  
I grabbed his hand and bounced excitedly. “Guess what?”  
Shane cocked his head to one side. “What?”  
Robin smiled. “We were just going over plans to build a barn!”  
“And then upgrade the chicken coop,” I added. I gestured around. “The barn would go here and have room for four cows! And then the Big Coop would give me room for eight chickens! Or I could even get some ducks, maybe. That would get me set up to run a real operation here! I could run grass through here and have plenty of room to add in some fruit trees or something. Isn’t that great?”  
Shane glanced vaguely around and swallowed hard. “Sure,” he croaked.  
I blinked. I hadn’t expected such a tepid reaction.  
“Well,” Robin drawled, her eyes shifting between us. “I guess it’s time for me to head home. I’ll head back here first thing in the morning to get started. See you then! Bye, Shane.” She waved and headed North.  
“I thought you’d be excited.” I frowned. I emphasized, “It’s more room for the chickens.”  
He nodded. “Sure,” he repeated. He started walking South and mumbled over his shoulder, “Be sure to remember to water your plants.”  
I jogged up to him and grabbed his sleeve. “Shane, wait,” I pleaded. “What’s wrong?”  
He turned and his eyes were cold. “How many times do I have to tell you to leave me alone?”  
I gasped. I was furious and sad and hurt, all at once.  
I let him go.

 

I figured he would come with apologies the next evening. He didn’t show.  
Nor the next night, or the night after that.  
I wanted to be heartsick about how he’d flipped, but I just couldn’t bring myself to mope. Instead, I doubled down on being the best I could at farming, fishing and mining.  
“You’re making great progress on getting the Community Center fixed up,” Lewis said, his face showing a measure of pride.  
“Thanks, Lewis!” I smiled and sipped my cup of coffee. I didn’t tell him about the little creatures that scuttled about, taking away the fish I’d brought them and somehow magically repairing the broken-down rooms. I knew that was a secret between me and the wizard. Who else would understand that I’d learned a mysterious language to communicate with adorable, bouncy forest spirits?  
I would be sure to forward his compliments to the Junimos, though. I felt like they needed encouragement as much as I did.  
“I would just love it if we could someday get the Community Center up and running again,” Lewis sighed. “Your grandfather and I–” I tuned him out as he launched into another recounting of how he and my grandpa had kept the thing going through thick and thin. How important it had been, how kids these days...  
I let my eyes drift to Shane. He was standing in his old corner, drinking a beer, trying not to look conspicuous, though I could tell he was craning his neck to hear my conversation with Lewis.  
I blew a breath out between pinched lips. I wanted to go talk to him, but I realized I was tired. Tired of working so hard to be his friend. Tired of wondering what he was thinking. Tired of second-guessing myself around him.  
“... and that’s why I think we gotta stand up to Joja Corp!”  
My attention snapped back to Lewis. “Huh?”  
He cocked his head to one side. “Hadn’t you heard?” I shook my head. “Joja Corp wrote to the Governor about the land the Community Center is sitting on. The Governor is a good friend of mine, so he’s trying to buy us some time, but it looks like Joja will have it, one way or another, before too long.”  
I felt panic creep up on me. What would happen to the Junimos?  
“We can’t let that happen,” I said, decisively.  
“Why not?”  
My head shot up and my eyes locked with Shane’s. He looked angry.  
“Because the Community Center is an important part of our history,” Lewis said. “And Joja Corp just isn’t a part of our town.”  
Shane’s jaw was tense. “Are you saying you want to run JojaMart out of business?”  
Lewis looked plucky. “Well, so what if I am?”  
Shane’s fists clenched at his sides and he stalked out of the saloon.  
I dropped a tip on the bar and ran out after him. Shane was pacing by the river.  
“I want to be alone,” he growled.  
“Shane,” I sighed. “He’s the mayor of this town. Lewis has a lot of reasons to want to keep local businesses running. If Joja Corp gets that warehouse, I think it’ll run Pierre out of town.”  
Shane huffed. “But people have to have a place to work. People need jobs. Even if it’s the same thing every day, it’s important,” he explained. He kicked a rock, his hands stuffed in his pockets. He looked sheepish. Softly, he finished, “JojaMart isn’t that bad.”  
I swallowed thickly. It had never occurred to me that Shane might actually like working for JojaMart.  
He glanced up at me. Abruptly, he held out a hand. “Come on,” he sighed, sounding resigned.  
“Huh?”  
He blinked. “You don’t know what today is?”  
“Well, it’s the last day of Summer.”  
He looked surprised. “Oh, this is going to be a treat,” he said, a smile dancing in his eyes.  
I took his hand and let him lead me to the beach. We stepped out onto the dock and hung our feet off the edge. As night settled in, people began filtering down to the seaside.  
“Oh, is there a festival?” I realized I hadn’t looked at the calendar in weeks. Whose birthdays had I missed?  
Shane smiled. “Yeah,” he confirmed. I could tell he wanted to say more, but he seemed to enjoy the secret. Lewis and Willy began picking up the lanterns in the water and blowing them out, plunging us into darkness. Shane bristled as Lewis came by the collect the lantern at our feet, but bit his tongue.  
Around ten, everyone grew quiet. Shane whispered, “Ready?”  
I blinked. For what?  
Lewis pushed a little sailboat with a lantern on it out into the waves. Slowly, hundreds of little orbs began to glow in the water, bobbing this way and that. They flowed toward the shore and I could see that they were luminescent jellyfish. I gasped.  
“The jellies were here a year ago, and they’ll be back again a year from now,” Shane explained. He sighed. “Nature is amazing.”  
I nodded, in awe of the beautiful sight. We picked our feet up as some jellies neared. I gambled a glance up at Shane, and his face was sad and lovely in the faint light. His eyes met mine and he sighed.  
“I think I really, really like you,” I whispered.  
We let our gazes drift back to the jellies. We watched in silence as they began to ebb away from the shoreline. When their glow was completely gone, Shane pulled me into his side and whispered into my ear, “Please, please don’t like me.” He leaned back and let his eyes meet mine. “Please.”  
I shook my head. “Too late.”  
He sighed, frowning. “Let’s get you home.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tackling some feels.

I was harvesting some crops when I heard footsteps. I looked up and there was Shane, holding out a handful of blackberries, giving me a lopsided grin. I hadn’t seen him in weeks.  
“Mornin’,” I sighed, standing up. “It’s early for you to be here.”  
He nodded. “I was on my way to work and I brought you some blackberries,” he started. “And I remembered I forgot to ask about your melons.”  
“They came out great,” I replied in one big exhale.  
“I’ll put these inside, if you want,” he said, looking uncomfortable.  
I nodded and turned back to my farming.  
He popped out of the farmhouse a minute later, looking surprised. “You had your kitchen redone!”  
“Yeah. Remember, I talked to Robin about getting some stuff worked on.”  
He looked around. He watched Marble, my cow, as she plodded through the tall grass towards the barn. His eyes swept over to the chicken coop, where two black chickens he’d never seen were pecking in the dirt. I saw him count the rows of cranberries I was tending. “You really do have a real operation here,” he said, looking stiff.  
“Yes.” I suddenly felt awkward and judged.  
At length, he sighed. “I’m really proud of you,” Shane said, his expression sad.  
“Thank you,” I said, a ghost of a smile on my face. “I’m proud of me, too.”  
He drew a sharp breath. “You’ve got a bright future ahead of you,” he said. And with that, he left my farm and I didn’t speak to him again until Spirit’s Eve.

 

“I think we’re really getting to him!”  
I smiled at Lewis. He was holding out a flyer for a sale at JojaMart. “Maybe,” I shrugged. I had worked hard at repairing the Community Center–well, the Junimos had worked hard. I’d mostly just gone fishing. The Governor had insisted that to halt any plans Joja Corp had, we’d have to make real progress on getting the decrepit facility up to code. I wondered idly how on earth the little spirits knew how to properly wire a building.  
I glanced over at Shane. He looked tired. I knew he’d been pulling some longer hours at JojaMart. Part of me wanted to talk to him, but he seemed lost in thought as he scratched a cow’s muzzle.  
“Hey, have you set up your grange display yet?”

 

I locked arms with Alex as we stumbled our way out of the maze, laughing. We jumped over animated zombie hands reaching up through the ground. We ran up to Maru and I threw an arm around her waist, bumping her hip into mine. She chuckled and asked if we’d be willing to help her through.  
“Sure,” I said, panting to catch my breath. “Just let me grab a drink first!”  
“I’ll let my mom know I’m not lost forever,” she laughed. We walked, three-wide, back to the tables to load up on gingerbat cookies and cider. Maru wandered off to talk to Robin while Alex grabbed a football and jogged over to talk to Haley.  
I grabbed a handful of pepitas and turned to see if I could find the wizard when I walked right into Shane.  
“Where’d your boyfriend run off to?”  
The question threw me off-kilter. “Huh?”  
Shane jerked his thumb towards Alex. I nearly laughed at the ridiculousness of it, but Shane stopped my laugh in my throat. “He’s a nice guy,” Shane interjected, no hint of sarcasm in his voice. “He’s pretty talented. He’ll probably be famous or something.”  
“I don’t doubt it, but–”  
“Why is there no more pumpkin ale?” Shane strode off towards the table and picked up a mug of cider, drinking deeply.  
I reached out to grab Shane’s sleeve when Alex came up and grabbed me in a bear hug. “Ready for round two?” He smirked and added, “Maru’s ready when you are!”  
I screeched, “Sure, just put me down a dang sec?”  
When I got my bearings, Shane was nowhere to be seen. I sighed. “Alright then,” I huffed. “Let’s do this!”

 

I realized I was in a trance, staring out at the falling snow.  
The chickens and cows were all fed. I didn’t feel up to walking the long path to the mines. I had no business to take care of. I thought about baking or boiling up a stew, but I just felt cramped and lonely.  
Taking a deep breath, I felt a pull in my gut to get some closure. I threw on a coat and stomped toward town.  
I pushed open the door to The Stardrop Saloon and the snow and cold breeze blew in with me. Instead of complaints, a few hands went up to wave. Every face was warm in greeting.  
“Hey, it’s been a while,” Gus called, putting a cup of coffee on the counter. “You’re drinking on the house tonight!”  
I realized all at once that I was a part of this town. I had friends. It filled my heart with a joy I hadn’t felt in years. “Thank you,” I croaked, blinking back tears that stung my eyes. I swallowed. “Is Shane around?”  
“No, he hasn’t been here much,” Gus said, deep in thought. “Well, I’d guess he’s been as scarce around here as you!”  
I took a sip of the coffee. It was strange for Shane not to be at the saloon, drowning his sorrows. Why would he give up his routine like that?  
“Thank you so much for the coffee, Gus,” I said, gathering up my coat. “I’ve got to run, though.”  
He smiled broadly. “Well, don’t be such a stranger!”  
“I won’t,” I promised before turning to head back out into the cold.  
I pressed through the strong wind blowing to the Valley, heading east toward Marnie’s farm. The sun had already set, so it was hard going in the dark. When I knocked on the door, Marnie looked confused.  
“Sorry, hun, but I won’t be selling any sheep in weather like this,” she started.  
“Actually, I’m here to see if Shane is home?”  
Marnie blinked. “He is,” she drawled. “But I’m afraid he’s not been feeling–well, not like himself.”  
I frowned. “I’d like to see him, if he’s up for it.”  
Marnie waved me inside like a lost chicken. She bustled into Shane’s room and was gone a long minute. Finally, she emerged. She nodded, not saying a word.  
The lights were out in Shane’s room. He was sitting on his bed, surrounded by a frozen pizza box, a video game controller and tissues.  
“Hey,” I started, my voice sounding softer than I expected.  
He gave me a half smile that didn’t reach his eyes. They were puffy, like maybe he’d been crying, and rimmed with red. “Hey, good to see you,” he said. He didn’t sound sick.  
“I walked all the way into town to see if you were at the saloon,” I started, trying to sound light.  
“Sorry to be such a bother.” He cast his eyes at the floor, his face a blank to me.  
“Not at all,” I said, taking a seat beside him on the bed. “I really wanted to see you.”  
His eyes met mine. His voice came, disbelieving: “Oh?”  
I frowned. “Yes,” I answered, with all the conviction I could vocalize with one syllable.  
“Thanks,” he sighed, still not sounding convinced. “But I’m pretty tired. It’s been rough at work. Morris has been pushing us to make up lost sales.”  
“I’ll leave you alone, but Shane.” I took a deep breath, “I’ve got some things I want to say.”  
“Can it wait?” He looked miserable.  
“I don’t think so,” I replied, softly. “Shane, I told you I like you and that I wouldn’t stop. I meant it. I want to truly be your friend, if you’ll let me. I want to be here for you. And maybe you don’t want that or maybe you don’t feel up to it, but I want that.”  
He swallowed. I waited for him to say something, but he didn’t. Instead, I went on, “You don’t make yourself easy to know, but that’s okay. I think you’re very sad, and that’s okay. I’m still here.” I shifted and took his hand.  
He was frowning with tears pooling in his eyes. “I’m a dead end. I’ve got nothing to give you,” he said. “You’re wasting your time.”  
“I think we have a lot in common, you and I. We’ve both been stuck in ruts that we couldn’t get out of. But I don’t think that’s your whole story. It wasn’t mine. Even though I was in a dead-end job with no plans or hope, my grandpa believed in me and gave me a chance to find a different life.” I stroked his knuckles with my thumb. I finished, “And if I’m worth investing in, then so are you.”  
Crocodile tears ran down his cheeks. “I want to believe that,” he said, almost too softly to hear.  
“I already do,” I replied. “I can’t love you into feeling better, but I can believe in you. I can listen and care, if you’ll let me.”  
He nodded. He looked overwhelmed.  
“Whenever you’re ready, okay?”  
He nodded again. “Shut the door on your way out?”  
“Sure, Shane,” I agreed, planting a kiss on his temple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for your support! This story is a little different for me, and I wasn't sure if anybody would like it. It's nice to know I've got some readers out there drivin' the Shane train!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Farmer and Shane bump into each other

I opened my mailbox. Even though there was no note attached, the gesture warmed my heart: a microwaveable pizza. I smiled to myself and made sure to give the chickens an extra pet.

 

My breath caught in my throat. The massive ice sculptures glittered in the winter sun.  
Fingers laced through mine. “Incredible, aren’t they?”  
I nodded, awestruck. “They do this every year?”  
Shane hummed an affirmative.  
“I guess I never realized that there were such talented artists in the valley,” I admitted. Before I’d arrived, I had written it off as some podunk town. Quaint, sure, but not the home of true artisans.  
“We’ll surprise ya,” Shane exhaled.  
I looked up at him. A smile ghosted across my lips. “You have no idea.”  
He half-smiled back at me.  
“So how about you?”  
His brows furrowed. He clearly had no idea what I was referring to.  
I turned to him and gestured around. “It’s winter. Everyone’s talking about winter magic and woodland sprites,” I smiled. “Do you buy it?”  
“I’ve met some people who believe in spirits, and magic,” Shane shrugged. We started walking towards the edge of the lake. “But me? I’ve never seen anything that couldn’t be explained by science.”  
I thought about the Junimos. I wondered what Shane would say if he saw them. I stopped and looked up at him. “So you’ve never experienced anything that wasn’t... logical?”  
His eyes blazed into mine. I felt my face flush under his gaze.  
“Your cheeks are red,” he mumbled, stroking my arms. “You must be freezing.”  
I was actually feeling rather warm, but I wasn’t about to complain.  
“So are you going to enter the fishing competition?”  
I huffed. “I just about gotta,” I sighed. “The prizes would help me out a ton. Plus, I think Willy would be disappointed if I didn’t at least enter.”  
He glanced away, rocking a bit on his heels. He sniffed. “I don’t like it.”  
“No?”  
He shook his head. “It just doesn’t seem right.” He frowned deeply.  
I cocked my head to one side. “How so?”  
He drew a big, deep breath of air. “It’s stupid, but Lewis throws them all back,” he explained. “You catch all those fish and then he just pushes the barrels over, back into the water. It seems cruel to the fish.”  
“Why not just cook them up to feed everybody in the valley?”  
Shane shrugged with a half-nod. “It just doesn’t seem right,” he repeated.  
“I won’t do it if it bothers you that much,” I found myself saying.  
His eyes finally met mine. He seemed touched. “Nah,” he exhaled. “That’s a big prize.”  
I frowned to myself. “No, you’re totally right,” I insisted. “The prizes are just some fishing lures. I’d rather just make them myself.” Never mind that I had no idea how to make any fishing lures at all.  
Shane’s eyes sparkled. “No, really, you don’t–”  
I held up a hand. “Anyway,” I exhaled in a rush. “I’d rather go check out those igloos with you.”  
He looked hopeful. “Really?”  
I nodded. Shane grabbed my hand and dragged me toward one. “You’re gonna love this,” he promised, grinning at me over his shoulder.  
I knew I would.

 

“Happy birthday,” I smiled, holding out a single void egg.  
“Oh, is it my birthday today? I guess it is. Thanks. This is nice,” Sebastian mumbled, trying not to look pleased.  
I smirked and rolled my eyes. Abigail had told me Seb had been wringing his hands all week, worried no one would remember. I figured one of the red-speckled black eggs would suit his aesthetic, and from the glimmer in his eyes, I wasn’t wrong.  
“Welp,” I sighed, clapping him on the back. “I gotta get back to farm life. Enjoy your smoke.”  
Seb waved as I turned to go.  
I was rummaging through my bag as I walked, and I found myself tumbling, doing a faceplant that Sam would no doubt applaud. I realized I hadn’t been watching where I was going and had run smack into Shane.  
“Oh hey,” I wheezed, collecting myself from the fall.  
“Hey,” Shane said, sounding distracted. I followed his gaze back to Seb, who was leaning against the fence, tossing the egg back and forth between his hands.  
“Oh, it’s his birthday. Be sure to wish him a good one,” I smiled.  
Shane’s eyes didn’t leave Sebastian. “Sure.”  
“I was just on my way back home,” I drawled, trying to catch Shane’s attention. “Wanna walk with me?”  
“Nah,” he replied, still not looking at me.  
I stepped into his line of sight. I asked, exasperated, “What?”  
“Huh?” Shane shifted on his feet and mumbled, “Nothing.”  
I rolled my eyes. “Nope, not playing that game,” I said, crossing my arms. “What?”  
He glanced around me at Sebastian, then looked at me, his expression equal parts hurt and guilty. “No, it’s no big deal.”  
“No,” I insisted, clutching his arm. “Please.”  
He swallowed. “It’s just…” Shane looked uncomfortable. “Well, I mean. You always give me eggs.”  
I blinked as I absorbed this. “Yeah, and I don’t plan to stop,” I said, carefully.  
Shane tossed his head, not satisfied with my explanation. “Just…” He sighed. “Feelin’ a little jealous here,” he admitted.  
I smiled. “I gave Sebastian a void egg because I figured he would like how they look,” I offered. “And I figured you would not like them very much.”  
He nodded. “Void chickens do kinda weird me out,” he muttered.  
“I give just about everybody in the valley gifts.”  
Shane looked at me, a little alarmed.  
“But I give you the most,” I finished.  
He smiled. At length, he said, “I don’t give anybody gifts. Well, except for you and Jas.”  
I frowned. “Nobody?”  
He chuckled. “Unless you count my rent payment to Marnie a gift?”  
I shook my head. “Why not?”  
He inhaled deeply. “I guess I never really wanted to give anybody gifts until I met you.”  
I steered Shane towards the saloon and we walked together slowly. “I think you should,” I said, at length.  
“Why?”  
I drew a breath. “Because I feel like maybe you don’t have a lot of people you’re close to here in the Valley,” I answered.  
“Yeah,” he admitted. “That’s why I don’t give anybody gifts.”  
I smiled. “Right, but I think you should think about changing that.”  
He pursed his lips, then looked at me for a moment. “Maybe.” He sighed, then said, “For a long time, I pretty much kept to myself. Just went in for work, went to knock back a few at the Stardrop, then went home for bed. And then… well, you happened.”  
I felt myself flush. We stopped in front of the saloon and I turned to face him.  
“Sorry if I came off as rude when we first met. It takes me a while to warm up to strangers. I’m really glad you didn’t let me scare you off,” he finished, taking my mittened hands in his.  
“Me too,” I smiled.

 

I crossed my arms and watched as the bus roared to life.  
Pam whooped behind the wheel, throwing her hands up. She leaned her head out the window. “I don’t know how you did it,” she chuckled. “But by golly, it’s ready to roll!”  
I gave her a tight-lipped smile. It felt wrong to be taking credit for the Junimos’ hard work, but I had no other option. In truth, they had repaired the bus in the night using whatever magic it is they work, and I had just been the messenger. I was impressed that Pam was thrilled to be working again.  
“What’s this?”  
I turned on my heel. Morris came stomping toward the kiosk where I stood. He gestured angrily at the bus. “What’s the meaning of this?”  
“Um, the bus is repaired?”  
He snarled. “Of course I can see that, but how?”  
“I fixed it,” I lied through clenched teeth.  
“Impossible! I know for a fact it was irreparable!”  
I glared at him. “And how would you know that?”  
He sputtered. “I… I… It doesn’t matter!”  
I frowned. I glanced between him and the bus. I wasn’t making the connection. My eyes followed Pam as she shut off the engine and wandered over. “Why are you so worried?”  
“Worried? No, I’m not worried,” he said, giving a tinny laugh. “Of course not, why should I be? It’s just a bus. It doesn’t go anywhere interesting, I’m sure.” He turned and stalked away.  
“Why’s he worried folks might get out to the Calico Desert?”  
I took a deep breath to try to shake off the anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach. “I don’t know, but I know who to ask.” I waved goodbye, and headed South.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Farmer digs for information about why Morris was so upset.

“Oh man, I’m so glad you’re here,” Shane exhaled, grabbing my hand and dragging me into his room. “What does Demetrius like?”  
“Huh?”  
He was pacing. “I drew his name in the secret gift exchange,” Shane explained. “I thought about what you said and I want to give him a present he’ll really like.”  
“Oh!” I thought a moment. “Hm. Well, he has asked me before for some gems and vegetables, but that was mostly for his sciencey stuff.”  
“Ehh.” Shane didn’t look too impressed. He took a swig from a beer.  
“Yeah,” I sighed. I racked my brain for a moment. “Wait, I see him all the time at Alex’s ice cream stand in the summer. I think he must really love ice cream!”  
Shane smiled. “That’s perfect! I knew you were the right person to ask.”  
I smiled back, but felt it fade as I remembered why I’d come in the first place. “Shane, do you know why Morris is all worked up about the bus being repaired?”  
Shane looked confused. “He hasn’t really said anything,” he started. “Wait, the bus is working again?”  
I nodded. “Yeah, but Morris showed up and seemed so upset,” I replied. “He said something about the desert.”  
Shane’s eyes went wide. “Oh, yeah. I guess he would be upset about everybody being able to get out there again.”  
My heart lurched. “Why?”  
“Well, because of the Oasis,” Shane replied, idly kicking a soccer ball around his feet.  
I gestured for more information.  
“Oh! I guess you’ve never been out there, so you wouldn’t know!” Shane chuckled at himself. “The Oasis is a store. They apparently sell some seeds that Morris hasn’t ever been able to get in stock. And some other stuff, too.”  
I frowned. It seemed like the reaction I saw out of Morris was a little stronger than just a man upset at store that wasn’t even real competition. I knew there was something more.  
Shane looked at me, his smile lopsided. “Want a beer?”

 

I pushed open the door to the Community Center and stepped inside. The space was so chilly. I mentally grumbled at myself for not getting the Boiler Room completed before winter.  
“Guys?” I felt silly calling into the darkness, but continued, “Junimos? Are you here?”  
I heard a few cheerful chirps as they began to fade into view.  
“Hi,” I greeted awkwardly. “Has anybody but me been here lately?”  
“Yes,” I understood. “A man we had never seen. Very angry.”  
I pursed my lips. So Morris knew how much progress I had made toward repairing the Community Center back to its former glory. He knew he was running out of time.  
I thanked the Junimos, then went straight to see Lewis. When I stepped into his house, I was greeted by the sweet, sticky smell of glazed yams cooking on the stove. “Hey, Mayor,” I called.  
He smiled, wiping his forehead with a dark orange handkerchief. “Good evening! What’s the news?”  
I took a deep breath. “Well, I think Morris knows the Community Center is nearly renovated.”  
Lewis looked thoughtful. “I guess it was only a matter of time before he started poking his beak where it didn’t belong.”  
I nodded. “But do you think it’s going to be a problem?”  
Lewis frowned. “Unfortunately, I think so,” he sighed. “I wouldn’t be surprised if some Joja bucks were going to be thrown around to try to speed up the foreclosure process.”  
I pursed my lips. That wasn’t too surprising. JojaCorp was known for padding the pockets of crooked politicians whenever necessary. I wondered if the Governor’s friendship to Lewis might take a back burner if cash came into the picture. “I need a few things to really get going with the Community Center,” I explained. “If there’s anything you could do, that would be a help.”  
Lewis nodded. “I’ll help how I can. But in the meantime, you keep an eye on that Morris character.”  
I winced. I knew just how I’d do it.

 

When I opened the door to Marnie’s the next morning, I immediately knew something was wrong.  
“Shane?” Marnie’s voice was full of panic.  
“Just me…”  
She grabbed my shoulders. “Have you seen Shane?”  
I shook my head. “Not since yesterday, when I stopped to chat about–well, we talked about the festival,” I exhaled in a rush. “Why?”  
She frowned deeply and began pacing. “He came home early from work and started drinkin’ real heavy. I didn’t think much of it ‘til this morning.”  
“Marnie, what’s wrong?”  
Marnie turned. She licked her lips, looking nervously out the window. I followed her gaze and saw only white beyond the pane. “He never came home last night.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still deciding how the updates are going to play into this story, but I'm thinking I won't follow Shane's heart events to the letter. Thank you so much for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Farmer find Shane in time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heavy feels. cw: suicide mention

I looked at the map in my shaking hands. I had already stopped by the Stardrop Saloon, and Gus had told me that Shane had indeed come in the night before, blotto and angry. Gus explained with sad, watery eyes that he had thrown Shane out into the cold. He tried to explain, but I stopped him. “From the way Marnie explained it, you probably didn’t have much choice,” I sighed.  
Gus nodded solemnly. “I don’t know where he went from there. The commotion rousted Pam off her stool,” he offered. “Maybe she’ll have an idea.”  
I had stopped by Pam’s. She said she saw him heading towards home. Another dead end.  
I knew Marnie would’ve looked everywhere near her Ranch. Shane had to be somewhere further away. Somewhere in Cindersap Forest. In this weather. When I turned the corner near Marnie’s, I decided to head South, figuring that I’d take my horse and sweep East, then back around.   
I tried not to think too hard about what I’d do if I didn’t find him. Or… well, worse.  
I tucked the map back in my rucksack and we pressed on. The wind was bitterly cold and there was no time to waste. My stomach lurched as Jumbles slogged through a snowdrift. It was too cold. I urged her to go faster.  
I almost missed the sound in the whipping wind. A groan. I pulled on the reins, listening intently. Wisps of smoke caught my eye, and I cried, “Hyah!” She took off at an uneasy trot. I felt my scarf catch on a branch and rip from my throat, but it seemed so inconsequential.  
When I finally caught sight of him, he was lying in a heap at the edge of the cliff, covered in a rough wool blanket. I dismounted and ran, calling his name.  
“I kept a fire for him,” a voice came, startling me. I spun on my heel.  
“Linus!” My dear friend’s face was a welcome sight.  
“My back is too bad to carry him to the doctor’s, and I was afraid to leave him too long to find help,” he said, sounding very sorry.  
“No, Linus, you did the right thing,” I exhaled, kneeling. “If you’d left him alone, who knows what might’ve happened.”  
I gathered Shane into my arms. He was mumbling something. I leaned closer. “I… I’m sorry,” he hiccuped. “M-My life… It’s a pathetic joke. Look at me... ”  
I did. I saw a man surrounded by empty bottles and sadness. He was lying in his own sick, but he didn’t look like a joke to me, like a punchline. He looked like someone who needed help.  
He sobbed, “Why do I even try? I’m too small and stupid to... take control of my own life. I’m just a p-piece of soiled garbage, flittering in the wind.” He shakily hauled himself up on one arm and burped, yet I still found no humor.  
“I’ve been coming here often, lately,” he said, surprising me. “Looking down…”  
He glanced over his shoulder, quiet. “Here’s a chance to finally take control of my life,” he said at length. “These cliffs.”  
I felt my brow furrow as I followed his gaze. What? What did he–oh, Shane. No.  
“B-but,” he burped. “But I’m too scared, too anxious. Just like always.”  
I stood and looked out over the cliff with wide eyes.  
“All I do is work, sleep and drink. T-to dull the feelings of self-hatred. Why should I even go on? Tell me,” he begged, his bloodshot eyes finally meeting mine. “T-tell me why I shouldn’t roll off this cliff right now?”  
“Shane,” I started, but caught myself. Part of me wanted to spit out the sorts of things a person should say, about so much to live for, to remind him of his loved ones, his obligations. But I knew Shane better than that. Jas and Marnie were never far from his thoughts. When I watched him out of the corner of my eye, I could see him gnawing at his lip, worry written all over his features. I wondered if maybe, in some small way, if their love didn’t add to his burden. Being needed and cared for can be a double-edged sword for someone who was struggling to carry their own load.  
“Your decisions are your own,” I answered. “But I’m here for you.”  
He sighed, nodding, and the tension in his body seemed to melt away. “Thanks… I appreciate that. I really do,” he said. His head drooped forward. “I think you should take me to the hospital now.”

Harvey explained that he had done plenty to care for Shane’s body, but that he was much more concerned about Shane’s mental health. I nodded along as he mentioned a specialist in Zuzu City. He stopped talking when he saw me shiver.  
He put me in a bed right beside Shane and wouldn’t let me up until I took a nap. When I awoke, I told Harvey I had to check on my livestock.  
He eyed me. “Shane is lucky to have a special person like you in his life,” he said, looking a bit far away.

The knock at my door startled me.  
I opened the door to Shane, shifting on his feet, his fists jammed in his pockets. The bags under his eyes looked like bruises.  
I swallowed a gasp.  
“Hey,” he greeted, his lips pushed to one side.  
“Hey yourself,” I said, my voice barely a whisper.  
He rubbed the back of his head. “Oh man, uh… how do I say this?”  
I waited.  
“I’m really sorry about what happened at the cliffs,” he started. “That was… embarrassing.”  
I blinked. He was apologizing for going through such a serious crisis? “I’m just happy you’re still here,” I replied.  
“Wow, it was that serious, huh? I can hardly remember…” He turned and looked down the road, avoiding my eyes. “I’ve decided I want to see a therapist. Harvey got me in touch with a colleague of his…”  
I breathed, “That’s great, Shane.”  
He flicked his eyes to mine, not turning his head. “Anyway, I just wanted to thank you for…” He paused, a little colour rising in his cheeks. “Well, for taking care of me.”  
“You don’t have to thank me,” I said, letting a smile hit my lips.  
He looked at me seriously, full-on. “And I want you to know that I’m going to take things a little more seriously from now on,” he said, then turned and hung his head. “I don’t want to be a burden on anyone…”  
I placed a hand on his shoulder. “Shane, taking things seriously is not your problem. And not for a minute have I considered you a burden.”  
“Heh,” he scoffed. I watched him walk south until he disappeared among the trees.


	6. Chapter 6

The Feast of the Winter Star was dazzling. Gus had created giant sugar candy canes to line the town square, and swaths of fresh cut greenery decked the light posts. Wide tables bore a startling array of treats. Heaters beneath every table kept legs toasty… and gluhwein took care of the rest.  
I wandered over to Shane, who gave me a half-smile that didn't quite spread into his eyes. I whispered, “Come visit me after, okay?” He nodded, and I left him to enjoy the turkey.  
I tapped Vincent on the shoulder and presented him with some cranberry candy. Clint handed me a bundle of geodes, and I lovingly ribbed that I’d have to pay him to crack them. “On the house. Just this time, though,” he said, looking serious. I thanked him.  
I let myself get lost in thought as I stared up at the tree. At the same time the year prior, I had just put in my two weeks’ notice. With the new year, I had packed a single suitcase and set off to make my own way, armed only with a deed and the love my grandfather left.  
I spent my year working with true passion and purpose. Restoring the farm was a labor of love, and I was proud of the progress. I had gained confidence, friends and a little bit of gold. In that year, I had discovered that magic lurks just around every corner, but that love is always a little closer.  
I let my eyes drift to Shane. He has staring right back.

 

I was sweeping the snow off my porch when Shane appeared. He shook a thermos at me. “A little winter spirit?”  
I fought desperately to keep my face impassive, but I guess I failed because Shane chuckled to himself.  
“Don’t worry,” he said, pouring me a cup. “It’s my first sip of the day.”  
I nodded understanding. I took it between both hands with gratitude, cradling the tin mug in my bare hands, letting the warmth seep into my chilly fingers, breathing the steam deeply.  
“I don’t know any toasts.”  
“Oh, I can handle this,” I said, then held the cup aloft. I cleared my throat, for effect. “The wine may kiss the glass, the dew may kiss the grass, the lad may kiss the lass. And you, my friend, may… take a bow!”  
He smirked, and sidled up to me on the porch. “Not bad!”  
I chuckled. “How’s this: may misfortune follow us all of our lives, but never catch up.”  
“I’ll drink to that,” he smiled. We bonked our cups together, spilling a bit of brew. We both took a long sip. I savored the warmth sliding down to my belly. Shane and I stood in silence, looking out across the field as we drank.  
“I get sad this time of year,” he said distantly, his eyes fixed on the treeline. I nodded, letting that piece of information marinade.  
“This is when they died,” he supplied, picking at a spot on the porch with the tip of his sneaker. “Jas’s parents.”  
I studied his face for a long time. Wordlessly, I waved him inside. With one glance through the doorway at the fire, he shuffled in. We started peeling off our winter layers.  
As I hung my hat on a coat hook, I asked, “How old was she?”  
“Four,” he answered with a frown. “Just old enough, you know? For it to really throw her off. She was fearless before that. I’m glad she’s got Vincent and Penny. Otherwise, she’d just skip rope by herself all day, and never talk to anyone.”  
I nodded then weaved past Shane and picked up a couple throw pillows to make room for us both on the couch. “May I ask how it happened?”  
He shrugged. “It was bad,” was his reply as he sat. “Sudden. Awful.”  
“Oh,” I exhaled. After a moment, I prompted, “So you were her guardian then?”  
He shook his head. “She went to her grandfather’s first.” His eyes were trained on the fire and his voice was full of bitterness as he said, “She was there less than a month. It was so bad they sent her to live with a deadbeat in a bachelor pad with two roommates and beer bottles everywhere.”  
“Oh,” I repeated, my heart aching for them both.  
“I just called Marnie, told her everything,” Shane continued. “She told me to pack our things and move to the valley, no questions asked. So I did.”  
“That was so kind of her.”  
He nodded. “Marnie knew the shoes we were in,” he sighed.  
“You couldn’t turn to your parents?”  
Shane shook his head sharply. “No. My mom died a few years back. My dad–” Shane sighed. “My dad is an alcoholic, and an abusive ass. He lives alone in an apartment in the slums, throwing rocks at alley cats. He… wasn’t a good dad.”  
I drew a deep breath. “I’m glad you’re on a different path.”  
He threaded his fingers through his hair, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “Am I?”  
“Yes.”  
He scoffed.  
I knelt in front of him, taking his hands in mine and catching his eyes. “You are, Shane.”  
“I’m–I use alcohol to cope. I’m depressed.” He sighed, “I’m a total dick. I push everyone away.”  
“You can be an ass, but I think that’s you coping, too.” I cupped his cheek. “You do have depression. But that doesn’t mean that you’re going to end up like him. You get to choose. And you’ve already chosen to be a better father.”  
Shane turned his face into my touch, kissing my wrist, hiding his unshed tears.  
“Did you talk about that when you went to Zuzu City on Tuesday?”  
He looked into the fire again, avoiding my eyes. “You know what’s dumb?”  
I shook my head, confused.  
“I paid buku bucks for this appointment, supposedly to fix what’s wrong with me. I figured we’d talk about childhood trauma or that I’m in love with my mother or something,” he joked, letting his gaze fall to his lap. “But... all I could talk about was you.”  
For half a second, I was adrift. Was I a problem? Did he mean I was something bad in his life?  
But then, he lifted his eyes and smiled at me.  
Oh. “Oh,” I breathed. And when he kissed me, I made a mental note to tell him later that it wasn’t dumb at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, but I felt like it was where this chapter needed to stop.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The farmer visits a friend and works out a puzzle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long one, and Shane's not even in it!

I took another sip of the strange tea, trying to keep my lip from curling. It was bitter and smelled unlike anything I had ever encountered. My friend had assured me that, “The strength that it creates is far greater than the revulsion that it makes.”  
I took another quick sip, grateful that I had a friend who could make weird brews of mystical origin to keep my butt from getting kicked whenever I went into the mines.  
“So what will you do now that your lad can offer you no more help with the Morris situation?”  
I sat my cup back in its saucer with a satisfying clink. “I’m just not sure. I tried asking around town about Morris. Sam declared him ‘way weird’, Pam doesn’t know much more than insisting he has the hots for her, Jodie shops there but hasn’t ever really spoken with the man,” I huffed. “And everyone else pretty much just hates him. Especially Pierre.”  
M. Rasmodius nodded, taking a slow, slurping sip from his own cup. “I was quite afraid of this,” he admitted, picking at his napkin. “Morris, like any true foe, makes himself quite unknowable.”  
“I’m out of ideas,” I sighed. “The new year is nearly here. When the weather warms up, I feel like Joja Corp will double down on their plans to take over the Community Center. It’s only a matter of time.”  
The wizard looked at me, his face serious and sharp. “Of course you are well aware of the repercussions if that were to take place.”  
I looked into the fire. “The poor junimos…”  
The wizard kept his eyes fixed on me. “I have seen many things about your future,” he said.   
He had said this to me before, but this time, it gave me a swelling hope. “Tell me,” I pleaded.  
He shook his head. “If I were to tell you, it would have dire consequences.”  
I swallowed. “Can you tell me anything about how I get Morris to leave this town alone?”  
My friend studied my face for a long moment. At length, he said, “As with any true villain, you are embattled in a game of chess. How does he plan his moves?”  
I frowned. “Moves?”  
The wizard nodded, motioning for me to get thinkin’.  
“Aside from going to the governor and making Shane miserable, he hasn’t been up to much.”  
The wizard smirked. “Is that so? Think harder. Think on what draws your foe’s eye.”  
I looked into my murky cup. An idea struck me. “He got spittin’ mad when he saw that the junimos had gotten the bus fixed. He thought I did it,” I offered. “But Shane said Morris was probably just mad that everyone would be able to get out to The Oasis.”  
“So do you agree with your lad’s assessment?”  
I thought on it. “No,” I realized aloud. “He was way too mad. And The Oasis isn’t really a competitor.”  
M. Rasmodius rested his head on a fist. “And have there been other occasions when our foes at Joja have been displeased with our fair valley’s progress?”  
It was an odd question, and one that stumped me for a moment. “I know they really groused when people insisted they fix the mudslide by the cave.”  
The wizard nodded. “And what you may not know is that the boulders blocking us off from the trains–and my ex-wife, as luck would have it–fell during that same construction project.”  
I sat up in my seat. “I didn’t know that.”  
“In fact,” the wizard smiled. “There are many things around the valley that fell into disrepair only very recently. Within the last couple years, really. The Community Center itself, for instance.”  
My eyebrows furrowed. “Are you saying that Morris is sabotaging Stardew Valley?”  
The wizard held his hands up. “Surely I can not say, for I would be revealing secrets whispered to me by the fire,” he chuckled.  
I smiled. “So if I were to assume that this is our foe’s game,” I thought aloud. “Why isn’t he going in behind me and breaking everything I fix?”  
The wizard narrowed his eyes, a smile still fixed beneath his purple whiskers. “Think on that.”  
I pieced the timeline together. If everything in town started breaking down all at once, everyone would surely be asking questions. Why weren’t they? There had to be some explanation behind why everything went to pot–  
I shot to my feet. “My grandfather,” I gasped.  
The wizard leaned back and smiled. “He was such a good man. Not as aligned with the arcane as you seem, but a kind heart. If anything were amiss, he would repair it with his own two hands, there on the spot,” M. Rasmodius explained.  
“So with him gone,” I continued the thought, pacing, “Joja figured breaking stuff down would be explained away. But why? Why do it?”  
The wizard chuckled. “Oh, I think that’s fairly obvious.”  
I frowned, crossing my arms. “Surely it can’t just be money?”  
“Greed can make men behave in curious ways,” the wizard intoned. “Particularly when those men band together and call themselves a ‘corporation’. They are cutting the people of the valley off from Yoba’s bounty.”  
I put a fist on my hip. “So they’ll just depend on Joja for everything. Food, jobs…”  
The wizard nodded. “And thus, the future is in your hands. You must choose whether to send Joja on their way, or whether they will have their way with our valley.”  
I sank into my chair, rubbing my face. “It sounds so easy, but why do I feel…” I thought about it. How did I feel? I knew I should want to hop up and head to finish handing the little junimos every gift they requested. But… why didn’t I? Why did I feel stuck to the floorboards?  
The wizard leaned forward. “You feel conflicted,” the wizard answered. “And that is why I shan’t tell you how to proceed.”  
I frowned. “Isn’t it obvious that I should go and fight Joja back with all I’ve got?”  
“If it is so obvious, why are you hesitating?”  
I drew a long breath. “Isn’t it obvious?”  
The wizard chuckled. “It seems all things come back to you and your lad, my friend.”  
“He has stood up for Joja so many times. When I found out he worked there, I just assume he’d hate it. And the hours he works–surely, he must. But,” I sighed. “But he defends them. He seemed so angry and sad when Lewis said he had to run Joja out.”  
“For many, routine is all that keeps them moored in this life,” M. Rasmodius sighed. “Though I was never a fan of the mundane, some consider the mundane an escape from what waits for them when the routine ends.”  
That was Shane alright.  
“My young friend, I am quite afraid that I have nothing more to offer you in the way of advice. I could refresh your cup of Wildleaf tea,” he offered.  
I shook my head. “Thank you, but I’ll head home and think it through,” I sighed. I collected my things and bundled up. At the door, I paused and turned on my heel. “Can I ask your first name yet?”  
He smiled sadly and shook his head. “My name is something I won’t share, not even with you.”  
“Why?”  
He blinked. “You mortals give your names away so readily. But to have a man’s name is to have power over him.” He thought a moment, then asked, “Did I ever tell you how my ex-wife and I came to be separated?”  
I shook my head.  
“When we were wed, we exchanged our true names as a sign of perfect trust. We were very much in love then,” he explained, casting his eyes sideways. “But as decades passed, our love began to sour and I admit–I was not a true and faithful husband. I met another, so sweet and kind. During an argument–it was a slip of the tongue, but I said my wife’s name aloud. It summoned her there, and she discovered my infidelity. The went all over the countryside cursing things. And my lover never returned to my tower.”  
“Oh,” I gasped.  
The wizard’s eyes were cast on the floor. “Be good to your lad, my friend,” he said. But then he looked up. “Know that while his heart is hidden in fog, that never means he is lost nor is he unable to see you in the light. He is not too fragile to handle your mysteries.”  
And in the blink of an eye, I was sitting in my living room, alone with my thoughts.


	8. Chapter 8

“Shane, we need to talk,” I said, pacing. No, that would be too abrupt. He’d shake out of his skin. “Shane, I have something I need to tell you.” Nope.  
I sighed, flopping onto the couch. “How do grownups start very big conversations without giving anyone a coronary?”  
My dog didn’t offer any suggestions, so I just stared up at the ceiling. My eyes traced the wood in circles for fifteen whole minutes. All at once, I knew how this grownup was going to handle it. I shot up. One long walk, several deep breaths and three knocks later, I was standing in front of him. “Shane,” I said, “I want to show you something. Is now a good time?”  
He blinked. “Sure?”  
“We’ll have to go on a bit of a walk,” I explained. “So you’ll need your boots and a warmer coat.”  
“Uh–come in,” he replied, gesturing me inside. He started bustling around the room, picking up socks and mittens. He asked over his shoulder, “How far?”  
“Just to the Community Center.”  
He squinched his nose up, like he’d just smelled something foul. “Why do you want to go to that dump?”  
I pulled a sharp breath. “I’ll explain when we get there.” After a thought, I clarified, “Or at least I’ll try to, anyway.”

Before I turned the knob, I turned to him. “Shane, this is going to be a lot. I know you’re no shrinking violet, but this is a LOT,” I said, my eyes boring into his. “Do you trust me?”  
He looked a little wary. “Yeah.”  
I pinched my lips. I realized that was the best I could get from him. He’d trusted me with so much of himself along the way, and I knew I was thrusting this truth on him. But I honestly had no other options.   
I opened the door and we shuffled inside. Shane was casting his eyes around, a little unimpressed. “Shane, I know you’re going through a rough time. But I want you to know me, and I want you to know why I hate your boss.”  
Shane blinked. “You hate Morris?”  
“I mean, totally. Not only is he a jerk that takes advantage of you, but… well…” I inhaled deeply, and said, “This. What I’m about to show you.”  
Shane looked a little confused, but he nodded. “Okay…”  
“You know how me and Lewis are always talking about running Joja out?”  
Shane nodded, his eyes cast to the side. He was clearly annoyed at the mention of the old mayor.  
“Lewis is just worried about local businesses. He thought maybe I’d help him. He showed me the Community Center under the pretense of chasing out rats. He told me how my grandpa and he had kept it up through the years, but I could tell he was kind of trying to guilt me into following his footsteps,” I said in a rush. “But, anyway, when he brought me here, I… saw something.”  
Shane looked genuinely bewildered and I couldn’t blame him a bit.  
“They–erm. I, well... I saw–” I sighed, shaking my head. Explaining wouldn’t do. I decided to just get on with it. I turned and called out, “Junimos? It’s me! Could you come out? It’s okay…”  
I heard a few chitters but none bounded forward.  
I stepped closed to Shane and put a hand on his shoulder. “This is Shane,” I spoke to the walls. “He’s my–my friend. I trust him. It’s okay to come out.”  
Shane looked back at me like I was sprouting extra limbs. But just past him, a timid green being stepped around a corner, slowly hopping our direction.  
“Shane, look,” I whispered, pointing.  
Slowly, he turned his head to follow my gaze. He blinked as the Junimo chirped a tentative greeting, which I knew to him would sound like a singing hamster on a trampoline. With that, a few more hopped through the doorway or dropped out from under shelves.  
“They’re saying hello,” I explained, rather limply.  
Shane’s confusion intensified. “You speak… blob?”  
“They’re Junimos,” I corrected. “Forest spirits.”  
Shane’s head shot around at me. “That’s fairytale stuff!”  
Boy, did I have some bad news for him about fairies.  
I held my tongue. Instead, I stepped forward and gestured around. Even more had appeared, curious about the commotion. “True enough. Yet here they are. You see them.”  
He looked clearly overwhelmed, his eyes roving over the colourful little creatures as they hopped in place. At length, his eyes settled on mine. He swallowed thickly, turned on his heel, and stalked out the door.  
“That went well,” a little red Junimo mumbled beside me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little quick update. Hopefully, more coming soon!


End file.
